Sunday, May 21, 2006

My personality type





Your #1 Match: INFP




The Idealist

You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world.
Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships.
It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close.
But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop.

You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.


Your #2 Match: ENFP




The Inspirer

You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends.
You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules.
Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives.
You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller!

You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.


Your #3 Match: INFJ




The Protector

You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity.
Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is.
You are an excellent listener, with almost infinite patience.
You have complex, deep feelings, and you take great care to express them.

You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher.


Your #4 Match: INTP




The Thinker

You are analytical and logical - and on a quest to learn everything you can.
Smart and complex, you always love a new intellectual challenge.
Your biggest pet peeve is people who slow you down with trivial chit chat.
A quiet maverick, you tend to ignore rules and authority whenever you feel like it.

You would make an excellent mathematician, programmer, or professor.


Your #5 Match: ENFJ




The Giver

You strive to maintain harmony in relationships, and usually succeed.
Articulate and enthusiastic, you are good at making personal connections.
Sometimes you idealize relationships too much - and end up being let down.
You find the most energy and comfort in social situations ... where you shine.

You would make a good writer, human resources director, or psychologist.



Doesn't that say something about me? Three of them have something to do with writing...now I'm no Einstein, but I think I should consider writing... :P

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Hidden Bruises

You’re a bully.
You’re nothing than a bully who would do anything to get its way.
You think I care what you think?
I don’t. I don’t give a fuck what you do, or think
Do what ever you want to me, say what ever you want to me, cause it’s not gonna bother be
I always say that to myself and I’ll keep on saying that until you realize that you’re ruining my life with you’re words.
Anything you want you go straight to me, you can’t live without me. You want me to help you. You want me to pick you up whenever you’re falling.
I hold you one day, and then the other you’re calling me names and humiliating me!
You try to hurt me in anyway you can and you call it “joking” you’ve been “joking” with me my whole life that right now I’ve grown used to it. I wait for you’re criticism. I’m expecting it. Where is it? I’m waiting for it right now!
The worst thing about it is that you’re the worst kind.
You emotionally bully me!
And when I get angry or upset you turn around and bully me some more in disguise!
You’d say that I don’t have a sense of humor and that I can’t take a joke...
You have a disgusting sense of humor! What you do isn’t even partially funny!
If you keep telling a dog he did something wrong he’ll believe he did something wrong…
Does that mean I’m a dog now?
Heh the funny thing is you don’t yell! It’s the things you say that hurt!
I don’t care anymore!
Do what ever you want, cause I’m not going to listen anymore.
You’ve hurt me countless times all my life. And I’ve cried countless times.
And I’m sure there will be more in the future.
The whole time I’m writing I’m wishing that you don’t stumble upon this, but now I want you to. I’m hoping you read it. I want you to know how you ruined my life.
You’ve abused me verbally and you don’t even know it. I won’t let you see the bruises you gave me…NEVER!
I’ll keep a smile on my face and act like I’m not all broken inside…I’ll let you believe anything I want. Because thanks to you I know how to hide my feelings and not let anyone know how I truly feel about something.
So thanks to you, you made me …you made me into this torn lonely person I am today...
Thank you for ruining my life.


if only i can actually say all this to you're face...

Saturday, May 13, 2006

my big speech

I do what I do on purpose.
Don’t think it’s because I'm scared or I have low self-esteem and no confidence.I stay quiet and do everything you want on my own will. I do it because you will never listen to what I have to say, I know that you don’t listen and that you don’t give a fuck for what I have to say. I know your feigning interest for my passion of writing; does it look like I care?
I don’t care what you think! What you say is just sounds that I don’t even have the time or the will to pay attention to, all I hear from you is blah blah blah.
Heh is that what you hear when I talk about writing?
Is that what your reading *right now*?
Well if that’s all your reading then read this:
I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT ME OR WHAT YOU SAY ABOUT ME!
Because everything you do says it all, the things you say when I start to tell you what I want to become in the future, when I tell you about my dreams and the goals that I have set for myself. So why should I listen and see you doing things that hurt me?
I’m not going to waste my time seeing and listening to you bitching around and saying things that hurt when I don’t have to, when I could just save my time in doing everything I ever wanted on my own, without your criticism.
I know that I’ll get my turn to speak when I’m older; it’s just a matter of waiting.
So why not wait a few more years till I have my “ 15 minutes of fame” where I will say everything I ever wanted, I’ll know what to say because I would have written everything that I ever wanted to say to you….
I’m writing it right now. And all I know is that when I get the chance to say anything, the first thing I’m going to say is:
“I’m sorry for not being what you’ve always wanted me to be…”

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

A letter to you

I'm everywhere you go
I'm everything you see
I'm always in your mind
You can't help but think of me
I'm always in your face
You know what you did was wrong
I never let you forget what you did
You try to run away from me
But I'm always behind you
You always try to forget
But I'm always in your thoughts
The only way you can get me to shut up
And stop bothering you
Is to make it all right.

Sincerely,
You're conscious

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

what you are to me

You are always there
You are always ready to give
You are always generous
You are something that I don't deserve
You are always ready to guide me
You will always be there, I know that now
I don't know what I've done to deserve you
You are my hero
You are my anchor
You are the shoulder that I cry on
You would do anything I ask in a heartbeat
You are my life
You are everything to me
Without you I wouldn't be here
I am at your mercy
I am yours
Because of you, I am what I am today
I don't deserve you
You hold my life in your hands
I dedicate my life to you...
my family